Thursday, January 20, 2011

Will...

These days it seems as if I am running as fast as I can BUT I'm staying in the same spot...similar to what you see on cartoons---when the character's feet are going 100 miles per hour but he's not even moving???

I feel as if I am READY to become a mom, READY to share a new life with my husband, READY to wake up all hours of the night, READY to experience my child say new words, just READY.

After five years of trying, trying, trying, the answer is still no.

I feel like the sick woman in Mark, chapter 5. She had been sick for twelve years and her doctors gave her no hope of getting well or overcoming her illness.  She had heard about Jesus and that He was the Great Physician. She discovered that Jesus was passing through her town and she knew that if she could only see Him, touch Him, she would be healed.  But, she doubted that she would be able to make it through the crowds to get to Him. After a lot of prayer and motivation,  she made the choice to take a leap of faith. She pressed through the crowd until she got just close enough to touch the edge of Jesus’ robe and instantly she was made whole again. Healed!

Jesus said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well" (Mark 5:34).


I am making the decision to rely on my faith...faith that I WILL be a mommy, that I WILL share a new life with my husband, that I WILL wake up all hours of the night, that I WILL experience hearing my child say new words, it WILL happen.

“Keep on asking and it WILL be given you; keep on seeking and you WILL find; keep on knocking reverently and the door WILL be opened to you."~Matthew 7:7

9 comments:

Fabiola said...

It is hard and I know how you feel. And this verse will become my mantra for next few months too.

Thanks for sharing!!!

Unknown said...

I am praying with you Lianna.

Lauren said...

Lianna, I have complete faith that you WILL one day experience all this and more!!! Love you, friend!!!

Nink said...

Thank you for sharing this Bible story. It touched me so much today and is exactly what I needed to hear! I've been struggling about the WHEN, WHEN, WHEN, but you joyfully reminded me in this post that it's really a matter of WILL, WILL, WILL! Keep the faith, Lianna! :)

Meredith said...

I really enjoyed this post! Faith is the strongest medicine!!!

Ashley said...

Keep believing~ God has an awesome plan for you!!

Kendra said...

Girl - I know it's been a long, hard road so far. I am praying that THIS is your year. May the Lord bless you and David. May He make His face shine upon you. May He show you how He plans to make the desires of your heart come true!

I was reading a devotional for mom's the other night, and just staring at the cover thinking "I finally qualify to be reading this...I am finally a mother" and just had to sit there and let it sink in. It still doesnt feel real sometimes. But God knew all along it would be. Every tear I cried and every day, month and year I waited, He knew the very day - and the very children- He had in mind for me. And He knows the same for you, sweet friend.

Hugs.

Ashley said...

Wanted to let you know that I nominated you for an award over at my blog!

BeRight said...

I know how you feel. Years ago we were in the same place. But God eventually gave us two wonderful adopted children. They are adults now with children of their own. My nephew and his wife are also waiting to adopt, for more than a year now. When the time is right, children will come.